Karthik’s Log

 1) A straight line between two points is ALWAYS shorter than a curved line connecting two points. (Unless you are talking about Indian Railways of course.) ["The shortest distance between two points is a straight line."]

The train goes all the way to Coimbatore and then decides, shit, I was supposed to go the other way round. So, then it takes almost a U turn and then comes back to Chennai. Sad part: There is no direct train from Mangalore to Chennai through Bangalore. Funny thing is, the train reaches Bombay faster than Chennai.

2) There is a side middle berth in train these days. Side middle!!  I don’t know if people have observed this, but my train had two sets of numberings for the coaches. This resulted in everyone thinking they were right about the numbers, including me ofcourse.

Side Middle Berth

Stranger on train: “This is the new numbering system here” pointing to the numberings written on white paint with a white-board marker. (My idea of a prank if you ask me.) “This should be the right number”

Me: Wanting to show off that I can do math,

 ”See, we are in the 8th row and each row has 9 seats. 8 * 9 is 72. So this should be the right number, not that.”

Stranger goes all the way to the end of the coach, counts numbers, comes back and says, “Yeah. There are 72 seats alright.”

I give him a triumphant smile.

A few hours later: The TTR comes and tells me “Your seat is there” ???!!! Whaddaya know. My face went the size of an orange for an instant. Now it was the Strangers turn to smile at me. Ah, damn, wish I could wipe that smile off his face.

 3) There are these cool new LED displays on the trains which show you where exactly you are, which station is next and as it approaches the next station, how far it is. Credit to Laloo for this. (Or whoever thought of it and implemented it.) I don’t know if it used GPS for sure (must be though), but it’s cool all the same.

I reached Chennai on Saturday at around 15:30 after 18 hours of travel.

Ok, nothing to do with the Chennai rains of which I am sure you must have got innumerable mails (/forwards) with sad sad images. Ok, sorry. Let’s forget that. Not a ver ygood memory.

This has to do with my passport application. The story goes thus….

I had applied for a passport in June 2008 at Chennai. (The post can be found here.) That was followed by me joining Infosys again in June. What followed was Police coming home (relax) for passport cerification. And obviously I wasn’t available in Chennai. (I haven’t perfected being in two places yet. Still training.) So, now my online status says “Police Verification Failed” I tried mailing the people at the passport office to find out what I should do, but then surprise surprise, they don’t reply.

Then I went to their website to try and see what I should do. I thought the FAQ’s section or something will have some information on it. But then this is India. No information whatsoever. I went through the site more religiously than I have gone through my Engineering books. (return null;) That’s all I got. Nothing.

So I finally decided to take control of things, applied for leave (after having to literally fight with my PM. You know how it works.) and came to Chennai so that I could go there (come here ?) and find out. I asked a few people and they told me that I had to go to the passport office and give in a letter asking for re-initiation of Verification process.

I went to the passport office today. Had to wait in the queue for about an hour and a half to two hours. At the end of which I am told I can no longer apply for verification. What the ? Thsi guys tells me I have to produce a proof of my current address in Mangalore (Yea another sad story.) and proof of employment. After I do that, it will be transferred to Bangalore and God knows what will happen after that. Problem is I don’t have either. So I am pretty much stuck. Dead.

If someone can enlighten me as to what I can do, do let me know. I would like to get out of this situation ASAP.

Srihari tagged me. So here goes.

1. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?

IF I had one. (Do you guys really wan’t me to quote Sidhu on If’s and butt’s ? I heard he even brings in Zidane in his new version. Except no TV channel is prepared to air it. Haaa ha ha ha ha)

The other equally good answers:

ii) My lover would never betray me. (To which people might scoff and say, “yeah rite”. Not even “yeah right”)

iii) I don’t know about my immediate reaction, but when I do sit and do some thinking, I’ll just let it be and never talk to her again. If she ever called back, I would have to give her the “This ship has sailed” speech.

2. If you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?

Well, I cannot be extremely candid and ruin that dream. (Especially since it involves a girl. Ahem.)But here’s what comes in second. (And very close at that.)

To win the Nobel and loads of cash and other awards, by finding means to solve the energy crisis. (Wait till you are 10 more years older and then you will know the significance of this. )

3. Whose butt would you like to kick?

Tricky one. Lovingly ? Or to vent anger ? Assuming it is to vent anger, loads of people really for various reasons, Including the guy who tagged me. (For what, you shall never know. Muahahaha.)

Add to that Indian politicians. Now, who wouldn’t ?

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Make it ten billion and then get the guy who asks “What will you do with ten ?” to shut up by stuffing enough one dollar bills in his mouth. But, yeah if at all I made that much, I would start my own company and fund my own disastrous research(es).

5. Will you fall in love with your best friend?

Hey, I am not Gay OK ?

Well, assuming its a girl, maybe, maybe not. It depends really.(I know an answer can’t be more abstract, but I don’t want to go in boring detail. For further clarifications, you could mail me. )

6. Who do you think should make the first move? (Original Q: Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?)

I know everyone says The guy. But why ? In this day and age where woman claim equality in everything, why not this too ? (Why I am saying this is there have been times (maybe a couple of times tops) when I have simply not been able to ask people out. It would have really helped if I didn’t have to be the initiator. )

But that said, I’d like a old fashioned girls better. (Again Sidhu talks on if’s and butt’s) I know, I know, that will only be a dream.

Also there is this notion that if a girl asks a guy out, she’s a slut. See there is a difference. You ask one guy out, (and you really like him, yada yada yada) you are ok. You ask a million guys out, what can I say ?

7. How long do you intend to wait for someone you really love?

So baby I will wait for you…… if it takes the rest of my life. If it’s the last thing I do. (Yea, it’s not original. What do you expect ? )

8. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?

Attached ? As in ? If it means she is already with someone, I will let go and not ruin things. If it means likes me too, how the eff on earth do you expect me to know ? It’s not as if they bat their eye lids in morse code telling you “I Like/Love you.” Ok, that would be scary unless its a Chinese. Chinese can do that, believe me. But then we can’t understand Chinese now, can we ?

9. If you like to act with someone, who will it be? Your gf/bf or an actress/actor?

All the world is a …. How does it go ? Act as in act in movies ? No thanks. I’ll pass. If it means favourite actress, then loads in hollywood and our own dhak dhak queen Madhuri Dixit.

10. What takes you down the fastest?

If only I could fathom the meaning of most of these questions.

It’s a complex equation involving altitude from the ground, mode of descent and various other factors like, is a good looking girl going up the stairs ?

But yeah, mock drills with shrill fire alarms work too.

11. How would you see yourself in ten years time?

Very clever. If I say mirror, you will say eye. Let’s play it safe and say as a 32 year old shall we ?

12. What’s your fear?

I am afraid of a lot many things really. But yeah horror movies crack me up.

13. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?

Srihari’s post clarifies that. If I get into more detail than that, Ill be in a lot of trouble.

14. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?

Believe it or not, I would rather be Single and Poor. Be single and rich and the girls will be after you and you will never find true love. (Ok ok, relax. I know it is cliched.) Be married and poor, and what can I say, but poor you.

15. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

Earlier, walk like a zombie to the PC -> switch on the monitor -> check mails.

Now, Look at the clock -> shout out a few swear words -> bang hard on the bathroom door to get my room mate out -> run to catch the office bus.

16. Would you give all in a relationship?

Ok, here’s something really personal. (For a change I am not kidding.) Even if in a relationship , I would still want to pursue my interests and not make sacrifices. Why do you think I am so bad at this ?

P.S: Girls reading this post are supposed to read “Totally”

17. If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, who would you pick?

Now, the chance of me falling in love with two people simultaneously is pretty thin, but in that event, I’d have to say, neither. (Yeah, I am sad.)

(Slightly off note, its amazing how fat chance and slim chances can mean the same thing. )

18. Would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?

Forgive no, forget yes. (The person) Hey, I am normally pretty tolerant. But I don’t like people pissing me off.

19. If its your last day and you have one call to make, whom would you call? Dont tell me your mom. Someone else. (Original qn:What are your three most important expectations in love )

Last day of what ? On earth ? Hey don’t worry, if its my last day on earth it sure as hell will be yours too. Believe me.

As for three important expectations in love, hmmm. Lets just say it’s best not to have any expectations.

20. List 6 people to tag:

Marc
Vibushan (I hope he hasn’t been tagged)
Jaishree
Shivakesavan
Vinod
Sundararajan

Came to Chennai today after quite some time. (Last time I was in Chennai was somewhere around when I wrote the last post.) Feels good to be back. Feels good just to sit in front of the PC and write a post on the blog. Feels like freedom…

FYI: I haven’t had access to my mails and blog for the past 6 months. Just on and off.